Miss Jackson if you’re nasty


Is my name THAT old?


not “Janis” not “Jennette”.


It must be old.

I haven’t been able to find “Janet” at any tourist shop keychain kiosk since the 80’s.

And medical and car rental phone staff are dumbfounded these days.
I have to SPELL OUT my name.

Yet Janet Jackson has just released a new album and is cool and probably not looking for her name on a keychain at the Tillamook cheese factory.

I made a car reservation in December 2014 for our vacation this July.

I think.


I SWEAR I remember doing it.

I called EVERY SINGLE car rental place at the Las Vegas airport afyer first trying to logon to the website.

The general agreement of most businesses these days is “you don’t want to call us because we really don’t want to talk to you.”

Nearly everyone was nice and tried to help search for my reservation when I explained my “dottering old professor” conundrum. Even the pseudo artificial intelligence agent was nice:

“Chappie ask you spell your name?

Chappie look your reservation?

Chappie wanta car?”

(I am quite pleased the new robot phone voice is a guy and no longer sounds like my exacting ex mother-in-law…”I’ve gained weight, I’m ‘Jan’s’ size now…”)

Not Jan.

Not fat.


And then there was Patricia at Budget. She was the 4th person I had been transferred to at Budget.

And she was nasty.

Injecting a lot of “ma’ams” which is code for “bitch” in the intended tone.

I wanted to lay into her pretty badly but I resisted. I wanted to spend as little time with this troll as possible.

So I wrote down a 5th number and got “Kat” who was terse but helpful and got me the right information. I thanked her and sent the required email to Budget.

I heard something apropos in a Dave Ramsey podcast today. Something like “my employees better be sure the customer issue never gets to me (the CEO). If it does, they’re idiots with people and need to have their butts fired.”

Dave will never buy anything from SEARS EVER AGAIN

“and that was 25 years ago. And now I get to deface your name in front of 6 million people. Business is done through relationships.”

So, Patricia, at Budget, I won’t be making my reservation with your company though my former company has done A LOT of business with you in the past.

And it’s Janet.

Miss Jackson if you’re nasty.


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