While we are doing ranch renovations, I spend these hot, humid days at the Woodlands Mall before picking up Mr. W from work in the afternoon.

I never thought of myself as a mall rat, but here I am, getting to know the stores and where things are.

I have to say that I’m so glad I’m not a teen in 2016. I saw several teen girls struggling to find something to buy among the teensy butt cheek shorts and spaghetti strap crop tanks. 

The stores are in a fashion-desert holding pattern until after the 4th of July. Then, while we still have 4 more months of 100F+  temperatures, and threats of hurricanes, fall fashions arrive, of course.

On a whim, I went into Brookstone thinking about finding THE TINIEST UMBRELLA IN THE WHOLE WORLD but found the massage chairs.

Oh Lord. Like Heaven and torture combined.

The one above felt like the “ooo-ow! ” massages I get in Chinatown. Really good but sometimes painful. I wasn’t sure if the chair wanted to help me or kill me as it grabbed hold of my legs and checked my corpuscles for edema and spider veins.

The “quick” demo was 20 minutes and the chair felt so good unless it squeezed my legs or the “kneading hands” travelled to my bum. “What the?! Oh, um…gah!”

“Haha! Get her! She did squats the other day!”

I’m not sure if my glutes were helped but my lower back surely was.

I realized no one was paying me any attention (” you don’t SEE this thing going after my BUM?!”) so I put on my shades and relaxed, gluteus maximus and all.

Next time you see Brookstone-go in and give one of these chairs a try.

You just might like it.

And it’s free.